First Steps
by Niceonetoo
Summary: This story is set before the first series of Last Tango in Halifax begins. John has left Caroline and at the beginning of the story Caroline & Kate are friends but nothing more.
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1**

It was late afternoon on a cold autumn Friday. Caroline was sitting in her office finishing off some work. All the pupils had long gone for the day and only a handful of staff and cleaners were left rattling around the large school. There was a gentle tap on the open office door and Kate McKenzie put her head round.

"Thought you'd probably still be here" she smiled. Caroline looked up, gave a tired smile and removed her reading glasses.

"Trying to get these reports out of the way" Caroline replied, while indicating to the pile of papers on her desk.

"Oh, sorry, here's another for the pile!" Kate placed another file on the desk and sat down in a vacant chair opposite Caroline.

"Thanks". Caroline frowned a little and leaned back in her chair, rubbing her nose where her glasses had sat.

Kate couldn't help noticing that Caroline looked tired and commented to that fact.

"Yes, I am" stated Caroline. "It's been a stressful week…. What with the school inspection coming up, William doing his A-Levels, Laurence starting his GCSEs, Mum doing all these new things now that she's single and John, well…" She paused. "Well, I've told you what he's like!"

An idea sprang into Kate's mind, "Are you doing anything tonight?" she asked.

Caroline thought for a second and said "No, I don't think so. The boys both have plans, Mum's gone to a bridge night and John can look after himself".

"OK, so come to mine at about 7pm and I'll cook you dinner". Kate continued, "You can put your feet up, have a glass of wine and relax".

Caroline smiled kindly at the suggestion and felt a tiny release of tension in her body. However she was unsure whether she should take up the offer.

"I, I don't know. I don't want to impose" Caroline answered.

"Oh no, it's no imposition at all. I like to cook and it's so much nicer to cook for someone else and not just me!" Kate stated with sincerity whilst all the while maintaining eye contact.

"That sounds perfect. Thank you. How about I bring the wine?"

"Deal!" grinned Kate. Glancing at her watch Kate said "I best get going then, if I'm going to be ready in time and you best go home and change into something more comfortable so that you can relax properly" she said in her best school teacher voice as she stood up.

"Yes Miss" exclaimed Caroline. "I wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of you" she said grinning as she switched off her PC, stood up and walked across the room to grab her coat.

Kate walked to the door and then turned to get a glimpse of Caroline before she left.

"See you in a bit then" she called out and walked out the door.

Half an hour later Caroline pulled her car up outside her home shrouded in darkness. Clearly no one was home, as she'd expected. She hated going into an empty house. Then she thought about her meal date with Kate and her pulse quickened. What was going on with her? Yes, she liked Kate, she liked being around her but surely she didn't feel anything more for her? Yet lately when she saw Kate she would feel a tiny flutter in her stomach and her pulse would quicken and she couldn't help but smile. She glanced at the clock on the dashboard and saw it was already 6.15pm, she needed to get a move on so she jumped out of the car and hurried inside the house.

Kate had rushed home and quickly set about preparing the dinner. She wanted it to be just right so that Caroline would feel relaxed and could unwind. She knew her feelings for Caroline were growing and she couldn't control them, and she knew that Caroline almost certainly didn't feel the same, but something kept bringing them together. They would bump into each other in corridors, they would end up sitting next to each other in meetings, they would either be leaving the school at the same time or arriving at the same time – was it fate? Who knew? What Kate did know was that she loved being around Caroline and that she was always thinking about her. With the dinner in the oven, she quickly set the table, found some quiet music to play in the background, lit some candles and rushed upstairs to get changed.

Exactly on 7 o'clock Kate's doorbell rang. She took one last quick look in the mirror and ran down the stairs. Through the glass in the door Caroline saw Kate approach and couldn't stop a wide smile appearing on her face.

"Hey" grinned Kate mirroring Caroline's smile. "Come in."

Caroline stepped through the doorway.

"Wine as promised" she said as she handed Kate a bottle of expensive looking red wine.

"Ooh that looks good" said Kate looking at the bottle. "Dinner will be ready soon. Let me take your coat."

Caroline shrugged her coat off and handed it to Kate who hung it on the coat rack in the corner. She then motioned for Caroline to follow her into the kitchen.

"Mmm, that smells great" commented Caroline taking a deep breath of the fragrant aroma.

"It's one of my Mum's lamb recipes, it usually goes down well with guests" said Kate as she set about opening the bottle of wine.

She passed Caroline a glass and began to dish up the meal.

The meal passed very amiably, both chatting easily with one another. Having cleared up together they took the rest of the bottle of wine into the living room with them. Caroline sat on the sofa, feeling comfortable enough to pull her feet up beside her. Kate sat in the chair opposite so that she could she could continue to admire Caroline's beauty which was all the more magnificent to her in the soft light of the candles.

"Thank you so much for dinner Kate, it was lovely and it's been so nice to sit and relax for a bit." Although she said this with sincerity, there was little joy in her voice, which Kate immediately picked up on.

"Caroline, what's wrong? You really don't seem happy. Tell me to mind my own business if you want, but I'm here to listen if you want to talk."

"Is it really that obvious, I thought I was keeping a lid on it?" she replied in some anguish.

"No, it's not obvious; you are very good at keeping your emotions at arm's length. But I like to think that I'm your friend and so I take the time to look beyond the surface." Kate spoke softly with warmth.

"Yes, yes, you are a good friend Kate. I don't have many close friends so I'm not used to people asking me if I'm ok."

Kate stayed silent, waiting patiently. Caroline knew she wanted to tell Kate, but wasn't sure she could keep her composure. The way Kate looked at her with care and compassion completely unarmed her. She breathed out slowly.

"OK, well.., erm…, John left me and the boys earlier this week for another woman." She heard her voice waver, but ploughed on. "And although I'm not upset for myself, things haven't been good between us for some time, I'm really angry with him. How could he leave our family, our boys, our beautiful home for some woman he's only known a short time? I've worked so hard for our family so that we live comfortably, have nice holidays, so that he can do his writing and he repays me by running off with some... some..." Caroline searched for the right word, eventually giving up and slumping back into the sofa.

Whilst Caroline had been speaking Kate had moved quietly on to the sofa next to her, all the while maintaining eye contact to provide Caroline with the security and support to continue. Unable to fight her emotion any more, a solitary tear rolled down Caroline's cheek.

"I don't know why I'm upset, he's not worth it." She struggled to continue.

"Oh Caroline, I'm sorry. He's clearly a jerk who doesn't deserve you."

Kate opened her arms and said gently "would you like a hug?"

Caroline nodded and moved forward into Kate's arms. Initially Caroline felt tense in Kate's arms but she quickly relaxed into the embrace and as she did so more tears began to roll. Caroline couldn't believe what was happening to her, how she'd crumbled so easily in front of Kate. She didn't want to let go of Kate, she loved the feel of her warm body against her and the smell of her. She was suddenly aware that some time had passed and she was still holding Kate. She gradually pulled back so that she could see Kate's face. She dropped her hands to her lap but Kate immediately covered them with her own.

"I'm sorry" Caroline whispered.

"Don't be." Kate whispered in reply. Her eyes were searching Caroline's face for any sign that she felt the connection that clearly existed between them. Caroline held her gaze and gradually moved closer. Caroline was close enough for Kate to feel her breath on her cheek, and as her lips grazed her own she desperately wanted to pull Caroline into a hungry kiss but knew she mustn't. She had to let Caroline make the move; she couldn't take advantage of her in her vulnerable state. A voice in the back of her head told her not to let Caroline do this now, she'd probably regret it and never come near her again. But in this close proximity she felt intoxicated by Caroline and was powerless to resist. Kate closed her eyes.

Then suddenly there was the shrill tone of a mobile phone ringing.

"Oh crap" muttered Caroline as she sprang away from Kate and hurriedly rummaged in her handbag for the offending item. Kate shuffled along the sofa a little to put some distance between them, in order to calm her racing heart.

"It's my mother" stated Caroline as she answered the phone.

"Mother, are you OK? ...I'm fine, I'm at a friend's house, I got an invitation for dinner. I sent you a text message to let you know...The boys are out at friends' too. Do you need me? No, OK, I'll be home soon...OK. Bye"

Caroline turned to Kate, still looking a little flushed from their 'almost' encounter.

"I'm so sorry, my mother didn't get my message it seems, and thought I'd been abducted or something!"

Kate smiled, "its fine". It wasn't, it was far from fine, but it was probably for the best.

"I'd best go, I didn't realise it was getting so late. Thank you for a lovely evening." Caroline reached over to Kate's hand, "really, thank you for listening and being such a good friend."

"It absolutely fine Caroline, anytime you want to chat, give me a call." Kate answered as she gave Caroline's hand a gentle squeeze. They looked one another in the eye and there was another moment of connection. Then Caroline stood up and Kate went to get her coat for her. They said a quick goodbye and Caroline was gone.

Caroline jumped in her car, pulled the door shut and then slumped forward resting her forehead on the steering wheel. Her mind was racing, what had almost happened just then? She had really wanted to kiss Kate, she wanted Kate, she wanted to feel her skin against her own, to feel her breath on her face. Oh god, what was going on? Something inside her, long forgotten, was stirring.

Kate watched Caroline down the path, then turned and closed the door. Leaning against the door she closed her eyes and visualised the moment that they'd almost kissed. There had been something there, she felt it from Caroline she hadn't imagined it, had she? In that moment she resolved to tell Caroline exactly how she felt about her, she had to find out for certain whether Caroline would admit to feeling it too.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

The following week Kate tried to get a moment alone with Caroline but every time she thought they'd succeeded someone interrupted them. Eventually they agreed to meet in Caroline's office after the staff meeting on Thursday evening.

When the staff meeting finished Caroline managed to slip away without getting held up by anyone and hurried back to her office. She'd been thinking about Kate every day that week and knew she needed to talk to her. In fact every time her mind wasn't occupied she would find herself thinking about Kate.

She had already informed the caretaker that she would be in her office till late and would let him know when she was leaving. Since he lived on the site it wasn't an imposition to him, he'd told her so many times before. On arriving in her office she pulled out the bottle of wine she'd brought from home and found a couple of wine glasses that had never got back to the kitchens after a school party. She poured two glasses while she waited for Kate and checked her reflection in the mirror. She felt nervous. She heard footsteps coming down the hall, followed by her secretary's door being shut and then a gentle tap on her own open door. Kate's beautiful face appeared round the door.

"Hi."

"Hi" replied Caroline smiling shyly. "Come in and close the door. Wine?"

"Ooh, yes please" Kate responded, closing the door. She took a glass from Caroline and as she did so their fingers brushed which shot a tingle right through her. Kate took a sip of the wine to try to calm her nerves. Caroline indicated to the chairs and they both sat down. For a moment neither woman wanted to break the silence, both just happy in each other's company. Eventually Kate summoned the courage to speak.

"Caroline, I need to tell you something. Please don't interrupt me; I just need to say this. If you don't feel the same or are unsure or whatever, just tell me and we can put it behind us as if it never happened."

Caroline's heart skipped a beat, as she anticipated what Kate was going to say, but her face remained blank giving nothing away. She nodded and did as she was told and just sat quietly.

"For a while now I feel we've grown closer, but for me it has gone further than just friendship. I have feelings for you, strong feelings. I really care about you, and I thought it only fair that I be honest with you. What happened the other night, well nearly happened, I hope I didn't make you feel uncomfortable? I was really trying to just be a good friend to you."

Caroline continued to give nothing away as she took in what Kate had said. Kate sat staring at her wine not daring to look, fearful of what she might see. Eventually Caroline spoke.

"I appreciate your honesty and think it only fair that I am just as honest with you. I'm not entirely sure how I feel. I know that I like you a lot and I know that I was going to kiss you the other night, whether that would have been the right thing at that time, I'm not so sure. But I feel more clearheaded now and what I do know is that I can't stop thinking about you and every time I see you my pulse quickens. Looking at you now all I can think about is kissing you…"

As she came to a halt their eyes locked on one another. Kate put her glass on the table and reached over to Caroline, cupping her face and pulling her into a slow kiss. Caroline immediately responded, their tongues dancing together. Kate's fingers slipped into Caroline's hair, while Caroline's free hand ran up Kate's back. They paused for a moment to take a breath and Caroline set her glass on the table, then with both hands now free she pulled Kate back into a more urgent kiss.

Finally they parted, both breathing heavily. Reluctant to lose contact Kate placed her hand over Caroline's as it lay on the arm of the chair.

"Wow!" said Kate. "Where do we go from here?"

"I'm not sure" replied Caroline honestly. For the first time in years, Caroline felt an overwhelming completeness, like coming home. With one kiss Kate had made her feel more alive and happy than years with John. But with that came a whole lot of life changing implications which she had no idea how to begin dealing with.

"Look Caroline, I know this isn't easy for you, you have a lot going on at the moment with John and I understand that you have a family to think of. I'm not going to put any expectations or pressure on you. I'm happy just to be here for you."

"I appreciate that. I'm not sure where I want this to go. I don't even know where my life is going anymore. But just being with you at the moment is a light in the darkness." Caroline stated simply, giving Kate's hand a squeeze.

"Do you fancy getting some dinner?" asked Caroline suddenly. "I'm starving!"

"Er, yes, OK. What about the boys though?" Kate responded.

"I told them to get takeaway tonight as I knew I'd be home late. I'll give them a quick call to check they're OK."

While Caroline called the boys, Kate tidied the wine glasses away and put her coat on.

"They're fine, so we're good to go!" smiled Caroline as she pulled her coat on.


End file.
